Lies, the damn lies and... the euphemisms.

I was most impressed by Councillor Govindia’s masterly use of the words “affordable” and “regeneration” in his letter of last week.

His time at the recent Mipim property fair held at Cannes Harbour certainly was not wasted.

I am sure many of us look on in awe as Wandsworth Council simply marks down a £1m property to £800,000, or a £500 weekly rent to £400, and then magically labels them as affordable. If only a 20 per cent discount made everything else affordable in the real world, instead of just in town hall fairy tales.

The threats to the many pensioners on the Winstanley York Road estate under the guise of the word regeneration are even more impressive.

Unless they voluntarily sell their homes back to the council for just a few hundred thousand pounds, they will be served with compulsory purchase orders.

Meanwhile, new-builds of equivalent space on the estate are being sold off-plan for almost a million.

Who knew that the word regeneration really means to steal from the poor and give to the rich?

I do hope those champagneguzzling speculators partying hard on their superyachts moored at Mipim gave Coun Govindia a round of applause during his visit. Using just a couple of euphemisms, he is ensuring Wandsworth Council need never build homes for ordinary people to live in, but merely give profitable investment opportunities to overseas developers.

He then waves his magic wand and the results get labelled regeneration and affordable.

Bravo, councillor. It is a very neat trick.